Song Share Sunday #1: "How Do I Believe"

Hello, friends!

Welcome to Song Share Sunday, where I hope to share a new song every week from the "Run, Love, Run" album as well as some other songs as long as the project is in the works, though I hope to be done in 9 weeks. (*wink wink* that's how many tracks are on the album) I'll mostly share a little of the background of the songs in the beginning of each video for those who don't make it here to the blog, but here you will find the meaty and complete story behind each song. I promise that I will do my best to be as honest as I can to you and myself.

This week, we're kicking it all off with a song called "How Do I Believe."

This song is a huge prayer of mine (and maybe yours, too), loaded with doubt, fear, and a deep yearning for God to be present. This song came about when I was asking God why all these bad things keep happening to me. These things aren't necessarily bad, as God's great plan often includes stumbles and falls in order for me to grow and for Him to pick me up, but nonetheless, I was frustrated, tired, and angry in the moment.

There are also some parts in this song where I would ask myself how long I would last before my spirit or my body broke. I always knew that I need to go through many trials in my life in order for God to refine me, and I also recognized that God is a masterful builder, and it will be a long time before I am ready to be a masterpiece. So I wondered if I would make it to the end, or would I lose hope when I had no more strength, both in my physical body and in my will to patiently wait for healing and change.

This song started with my doubts and fears, but it continued on through my witness of a strong warrior whose relentless passion in serving the Lord continues to inspire me every day. I've served side by side with this brother, Ray, for five consecutive summers, where we discipled young middle schoolers and introduced them to Jesus Christ. Ray is the type of guy who loves his students and is saddened by the thought of missing a week of camp and not being able to interact with them before he even meets them. Besides being a passionate servant, Ray is also a passionate athlete, always balling as hard as he can. With that said, Ray had his share of injuries and surgeries, many of which held him back from giving summer camp his all, and he was so hurt by that. Last summer, Ray had to miss about half of the entire camp because of school, surgery, and  his "ball-too-hard" incident, and, boy, was his heart broken. I continued writing this song for Ray, because I knew this was a prayer he had in his heart many, many times.

I finally finished this song on an MTR train in Hong Kong at the end of a short mission. I was meeting my (then) girlfriend for dinner, and I was feeling just the right emotions to make me whip out my Evernote app on my phone to search for the right words to lay down to complete the song. So far, I had verses that screamed the weariness and burdens in my heart and begged God to put an end to my suffering. I was frustrated, tired, angry, and most of all, unsure of what to do. But my time of screaming and crying was up, because at that moment, the numerous people coming on and going off the train disappeared, the train tracks disappeared, and God spoke to me. He shut my mouth from saying any more and opened my heart to the sound of His still, small voice. This is what God said:

Is it not enough for you to let me take it all? Is it not more than everything that you don't have to fall? You can stand on mountains. You can reach the stars. If only you give me your heart. 

These lines never made to the final song, not because it wasn't good enough, but perhaps because it such a precious moment of mine with my Father, that it is better kept between me and Him. Jesus teaches us in Matthew 6:6 that the most intimate of moments with the Lord should be private and not boasted to the entire world. It is not forever lost, though, because it did make it to an earlier version of the demo which is only in the hands of some of my closest brothers and sisters who have always encouraged me in my music.

May these words touch your hearts as they have touched mine. Stay tuned for God's response to this prayer in next week's Song Share Sunday! Thank you for reading!

Check out my Facebook and Instagram for some extra goodies!

Peace, love, and Ikea's cinnamon rolls,
-Brandon

Official Announcement: "Run, Love, Run" The Album Project

It is my honor to announce "Run, Love, Run", a new collection of songs portraying some aspects of a relationship with Jesus, such as pursuit, intimacy, wonder, doubt, and reassurance. These songs are conversations which I've had with the Lord many times as I grew in faith, and these conversations will be had further down this winding road, may it be right now, tomorrow, or years from now.

Photo by Stella Yau

I had the pleasure of sharing these songs with Allan & Friends to some churches here in the Bay Area, and now I'm ready to lay them down into an album. You can follow the entire project here, as I record these new songs with my good friends. You'll get to see behind the scenes as I record, mix, and produce the final CD! I'll also bring deeper into each song as I reveal a new track from the album each week with "Song Share Sundays". Also as some extra goodies, I'll be coming out with some covers done with good company!

I am beyond excited for you to join me on this adventure as we bring the songs to life! I really want these songs to mean a lot more than they do. That's why further down the road, I will be announcing how this album will benefit some people in and out of our community and how you can join me in making a difference in the lives of some close friends of mine.

May God bless this project with love and grace.

Love, peace, and homemade ice cream sandwiches,

-Brandon

P.S. Keep up with me on Facebook and Instagram.

Broken Strings, Broken Hearts

I broke a string yesterday and I didn't know what to do with myself.

I came home after worship at camp in hopes of starting a recording for "Run, Love, Run." Naturally, I picked up my beloved guitar and started playing some of songs. Sometimes All the times it feels great to strum out some chords! The song led me into a palm mute, and the moment my palm hit the bed of strings, my D string snapped at the bridge with a twang! Needless to say, there was way too much tension.

At that moment, my heart stopped, and I suddenly didn't know what to do with myself. 

You see, my guitar and I have this really intimate relationship, something like what the homies would call "tight", but it's more than just tight. We're so close that I never needed to name her. We just know each other. She's there for me when I'm singing hallelujahs, and she's there for me when I need to cry. She sings with me and she sings to me. Most importantly, she is God's instrument. When she sings, God's words sing through her, injecting his Gospel straight into my veins.

I've broken quite a few strings just in the past couple of months. Maybe we're together too much.. Maybe we need break..

Nah, that can't be it. I just love to worship the God who paid for my sins with his own flesh and blood. I would put a ring on it, but I wouldn't know where to put it.

Fear not! God did allow me to have some fun!
Peace, love, and microwaved chocolate chip cookies (with a cup of milk, of course!),
-Brandon

Welcome to "Mountains Will Roar"

Dear friends,

Welcome to "Mountains Will Roar", where you can tag along with me on my journey with Christ as it is depicted through song and word. As my good friend Tim put it, these songs will document my relationship with my Father as it grows and grows. New songs are to come, but if you ever find yourself sitting and waiting, head on over to my bandcamp, where you can find "Chapter 35", a collection of songs about salvation and redemption. I'm very eager to share my joy of songwriting, musicianship, fellowship, and worship with you all! I can be very inconsistent and lazy, so I hope that this blog will allow you to keep me accountable to share my songs with you!

Here, you will find reminiscence of old songs, sneak peaks at upcoming lyrics, and a look behind the curtain of the fellowship which music and worship brings. It is my prayer that these songs will touch you as much as it touches myself. I want to share these songs with you as they happen to me because they are so precious to me. As John Mayer (another good friend of mine) said, "At the end of the day you go to sleep with a song you didn't know when you woke up that you were ever gonna have, and that's the joy of making music and that's what keeps me hungry to want to keep coming up with stuff. And as far as I'm concerned, if I could have every eighteen hours be that, I would."

As I searched for (and continue to search for) my identity through songwriting, I've discovered one of the unique ways in which God speaks to me. Many times over, I write a song intending it to reveal God's love to those who may come across it, and sometimes those people are very specific people in my life. Sometimes I would go back to song and break into a flood of tears because I would hear God's voice through the lyrics, reminding me of His love and grace, and that's why these songs are so precious to me. In my songs, I've found a tin can with my name on it, and attached to the can is a string. I sing into this tin can in my search for truth and love, and every so often, a gentle voice sings back to me, telling me what I am loved.

"Do not fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; You are mine." 

-isa.43.1

Peace, love, and really good chicken nuggets!

-Brandon